So I haven’t given my blog any love. I’ll be honest this is a de-stress IDGAF write. This is a so not concerned with pleasing readership at this point, because frankly there isn’t any kind of write.
This past week has been hectic. I’ve been all full mommy mode and having been away from my “day job” I’ve erased a bit of my identity. Has that happened to any moms out there? Have you ever got lost in being a mom? Isn’t it actually more the rule than it is the anomaly?
So rewind a bit: I’ve been on this extended vacation which means all this free time to myself to do the things I’ve always wanted to do, (AMAZING right) ?! I convinced myself I was going to take up hobbies and past times completely foreign to me. For example, this here blog. Food styling.
Acroyoga let’s not talk about that yet… the list continues.
The point is, I put myself out there. I’m doing these things. I’m trying. Insert –> school starting back up, and all the chores associated with that and no time to do the things I want or for myself = wrench thrown into mommy scales of balance = blah
In the past, I would burrow myself into warmth and familiarity of excel spreadsheets or get sucked into the endless loop of people management. All those little safety nets I strung up like, “I have to work” or “I have no time” could easily provide me a distraction from the “mommy imbalance”. That commodity doesn’t exist on extended fantasy vacation island “in the world of reinvention” to lean on in moments like this. Everything is foreign, new, uncomfortable.
I can’t turn to that amazing recipe I wrote, or remind myself that my upside down handstands are amazing (cause I don’t know how to do them, yet.) What I do know how to do, is stay forever stuck in the mommy mode abyss, avoiding the subject of imbalance all together until one day I have a melt down because I find a package of broken open crackers in between the sofa cushions (not a real story, don’t worry) but this could happen you know!
What I’m turning to are the things I know and the things I can do and share with you ! One of those things is cleaning veggies. Cleaning veggies is not really a thing of my childhood. My parents didn’t do it. So why do I?
I wash my veggies because I’m aware of the neurological affects pesticides can having on growing children. I’m also aware that synthetic pesticides can damage our brain and nervous system especially in growing children, disrupt our hormones and contribute to cancer.
So here goes:
- Take vegetables out of your reusable sustainable (non plasticky bag) it’s ok if your not doing this yet. One day, one day.
- Fill up your sink with water.
- Wellness mama will tell you 1:4 vinegar to water. She’s great, follow her instructions or do what I do and dump like a bunch in. I eye it.
- Go to instagram for 30 mins, or forget them overnight like I do.
- Drain water rinse, and eat your cleaner veggies. There is never any guarantee it’s all gone, but at least you know you did what you could.
Although I’m still very much in mommy mode, writing this out for you from my heart and mind puts me on the path halfway there to restoring some balance to me. It’s still not as great as mastering that upside down handstand thingy, but I don’t know anything about that yet.